Seven Samurai (1954) Movie Drinking Games

seven-samurai
  • Plot synopsis: A poor village under attack by bandits recruits seven unemployed samurai to help them defend themselves.
  • Star cast: Toshirô Mifune, Takashi Shimura, Keiko Tsushima
  • IMDB rating: 8.8
  • RottenTomatoes rating: 100%
  • Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcdStt0BLOs

Drinking games:

Take a drink whenever:

  • The peasants run around like frightened, retarded animals.
  • A samurai who isn’t part of the main cast wanders on screen.
  • You hear drums in the background.
  • Someone tries to run really fast. (You’ll know it when you see it — trust me.)
  • The peasants act like total idiots and run to Grandpa for help, despite the fact that they’re all grown-ups and are probably capable of thinking for themselves.
  • Someone mentions ‘millet’. (Drain the entire can if you actually see someone eating it!)
  • A bandit dies by sword- or spear-point, even though it’s obvious the attack would have barely nicked him in real life. (This does not go for bandits on horses.)
  • A bandit falls off his horse.
  • Someone dies. (You’ll get really drunk really quickly near the end of the movie.)
  • A peasant breaks into bitter tears. (Drink twice if they do it for no discernable reason.)

Take a drink when Kambei:

  • Gets shorn bald.
  • Has to remind himself he’s bald by rubbing his head.
  • Stares into the distance with a stoned look on his face.
  • Mentions some war he’s lost.
  • Tells Katsushiro he can’t go out a-fightin’.
  • Calls Katsushiro a ‘child’ or ‘boy’.
  • Looks at Kikuchiyo like he’s utter dirt.

Take a drink when Katsushiro:

  • Throws himself on the ground in a suicidal gesture of respect. (“Please sir! I fever to ask!”)
  • Yells at somebody for being dishonorable or for some similar reason.
  • Looks at Shino in that special way.
  • Runs off to collect flowers, or has a flower in his hand. (Take two drinks if there’s light, sissy music in the background.)
  • Actually kills someone. (It only happens once or twice.)
  • Does the deed with Shino.

Drain the entire container when Katsushiro:

  • Accidentally touches Shino’s ‘special area’

Take a drink when Kyuzo:

  • Decides to speak.
  • Kills someone. (Make sure you have a lot of alcohol for this…)
  • Does his impression of Lance Henrikson. (‘Bishop’ from the Aliens movies. You’ll know what I mean when you see it.)
  • Humiliates the peasants while training them.

Drink twice when (if) Kyuzo:

  • Laughs.

Take a drink when Gorobei:

  • Doesn’t smile.
  • Doesn’t fall for Kambei’s alertness test.
  • Makes Heihachi mess up his wood-cutting.
  • Compliments Kambei.

Take a drink when Shichiroji:

  • Rubs the sweat from his body with that nappy handkerchief.
  • Loses his temper with Kikuchiyo.
  • Discovers the ‘short haired boy’ is really a girl. (When they’re threshing their rice, or whatever.)
  • Kills someone.

Take a drink when Heihachi:

  • Laughs at Kikuchiyo.
  • Makes others laugh at Kikuchiyo.
  • Throws a rock at Kikuchiyo.
  • Believes Kikuchiyo’s gone, only to have him jump from the trees a few seconds later.
  • Officially ‘names’ Kikuchiyo.
  • Just disses Kikuchiyo in general.
  • Kills someone.
  • Pisses off Rikichi by accident, or tries to get Rikichi to talk about his wife.
  • Chases after Rikichi.

Take a drink when Kikuchiyo:

  • Does a little dance when he’s happy.
  • Claims to be a samurai.
  • Scratches himself.
  • Looks at Katsushiro with an “I’d kill you, but you’re not worth it” expression on his face.
  • Kicks dirt at Kambei.
  • Moons the bandits.
  • Fouls up someone’s plans by being a jerk.
  • Makes the peasants look like idiots by sounding the alarm.
  • Sticks out his tongue.
  • Makes the children laugh.
  • Makes fun of Yohei.
  • Kills someone with that big damned sword of his.

Drink twice when Kikuchiyo:

  • Turns up roarin’ drunk.
  • Falls off Yohei’s horse.

Drain the entire container when Kikuchiyo:

  • Starts chuggin’ the sake (near the end of the movie).

Take a drink when Rikichi:

  • Decides that killing is the only way to solve things.
  • Looks around with that “I’m a crack addict” expression on his face.
  • Yells like a junkie.
  • Shows way too much emotion for his role.
  • Bursts into tears whenever his wife is mentioned.
  • Kills somebody. (Drink twice if you hear him screaming at the time.)
  • Finally finds his wife.
  • Plays the drums (or whatever) at the end of the movie.

Take a drink when Yohei:

  • Cries.
  • Looks really pathetic.
  • Hides.

Drink twice when Yohei:

  • Kills someone.

Take a drink when Manzo:

  • Expresses his fear of samurai’s lustful intentions towards his daughter.

Drink three times when Manzo:

  • Chops off Shino’s hair.

Drain the container when Manzo:

  • Starts acting like a decent human being. (Don’t worry — it won’t happen.)

Take a drink when Shino:

  • Gets her hair cut.
  • Convinces someone she’s a boy.
  • Gets fondled by Katsushiro.
  • Wants Katsushiro to fondle her — and other things — and makes it damned clear.
  • Acts like a psychotic maniac.

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